act 4 beats

act 3 beats

Hardly set in stone - the pieces will be moving around 'til The End - but good enough for now and to walk away from for awhile. Next post here probably the last and will include link to Final, which I'll start next week.  

Goodbye, John's sister Rachel, and probably Dale. Still not even sure about Tom's truck model.  Not even sure Honda Knot sticks as title. 

1. Next day, sunrise, Hunter leaves in truck.

2. Chloe with Jan, John and Barbara. What do we know about Ruth? John, Jan re card to Ruth and Wanda. Chloe ties a Honda Knot, 

3. Gil, Maria re Tom and Hunter.

4. Ruth and Wanda, re Daisy, Hunter arrives.

5. Night. H, R, W re wine, drinking.

6. Hunter guest room, call Chloe, R and W about the truck. 

8. Next day, H, R, W re Gil's family. The gate. 

9. Gil on deck, truck arrives, Maria and boys watch intros.

11. Fort Park.

12. Ruth, Wanda, Maria kitchen. ATVs.

13. Doc gets Hunter selfie with Gil.

14. Night, R, W, H on porch, peach ice cream.

15. Gil with Bangkok pics.

16. Next day, sunrise, Hunter leaves in truck.

17. Flat, manual in glove compartment. 

18. Daisy gets call from Ruth and Wanda.

19. Hunter, flat fixed, call from John and Jan.

20. Doc.

21. Chloe surprise birthday truck.

Epilogue: Hawaii, Chloe paddles Tom's ashes to sea.

CREDITS OVER Gil and Tom fishing.

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act 3 beats

act 2 beats

1. Next day, sunrise. Tom reveal.

2. Hunter tells Chloe.

3. Wanda with Daisy gets Hunter's call.

4. Ruth gets Wanda's call.

5. Gil gets Ruth's call. 

6. Barbara with Brian, Jan and John gets Hunter's call. 

7. Hunter and Chloe watch Medical Examiner van drive away.

8. Wanda and Daisy Laramie airport.

9. Gil arrive Ruth's.  

10. Jackie at home, Hunter arrives.

what about finishing Honda Knot is so challenging

 

Hilary Barrett:

"You have committed yourself and made a transition. Even if the change so far is internal, a resolve formed or decision made, there is a sense in which everything is in place. Now you create success in small ways and in small things: you attend to details, working with what you've already decided or achieved. In following through, you stay loyal to your original reasons for making the crossing.

It's not that what you have begun here must inevitably fall apart. Only if you feel as if you've 'arrived' already and let yourself come to a halt, then you lose your path and then it all falls apart. Work with what you've accomplished so far,and keep your momentum: keep on beginning." 

.

act 2 beats

act 1 beats

1. Next day, sunrise, John and Jan, found them. Re Roy Rogers boots and Rachel.

2. Meet the truck, and Jackie.

3. Gil, Maria, boys, Foglost, Tom's Las Cruces layover. 

4. Rover, Hunter driving, Tom re last time on a horse into Grand Canyon mule ride, Tom's uncle in Flagstaff, re Ruth's ancestry website. Chloe re her aunt Rachel - "my grandfather's sister" - also keeping an online family tree. Chloe takes a selfie with Tom, on the contingency that she send it to him so he can forward to sis and wife. Jackie - "speaking of pictures" - hopes it's okay with everyone to be in the video her cousin's girlfriend would like to shoot. All in.

5. Wanda with Daisy gets the picture Chloe took. Speechless.

6. Ruth, teary, places same, framed, in her reading room on a floating shelf with Hunter's books, Trabuco, Isleton, and Scatterseeds: short stories. Foglost is on a lampstand near a chair she sits in, opens to marked page. WHIR OF CICADAS.

7. Sess, Claire, trailer, barn, horses. Arrive Rover, intros, Claire re her video and yes it will be online. Claire is particular re Hunter because she knows who he is, "my dad's a huge fan," but she wants to be sure re Hunter's privacy. Hunter all in. To the horses and saddling up. Chloe asks for a pointer, Tom provides and shows. The rest follow, ride into the forest.

8. Piney woods, WOODPECKER silenced by the cuh-lip cuh-lop of the horses as the riders enter and pass through frame, fanned out as if a search party. Resume WOODPECKER.

9. John and Jan on floats in pool.

JAN: Are we going to be possessive?

JOHN: Aren't we already?

JAN: We'll learn to be less so.

JOHN: Won't we.

JAN: Yes we will. There will be more pictures.

JOHN: I hope so, with trepidation.

JAN: Same.

JOHN: He's handsome, isn't he?

JAN: The Marlboro man in winter. I see kind eyes.

JOHN: A little sad?

JAN: Yes. Gut feeling.

JOHN: Optimism. That it's a good thing. Maybe a very good thing. Probably.

JAN: Hopefully.

JOHN: You?

JAN: Same.

They hold hands. 

10. Mountain Meadow.

11. Rachel tells Cedric what she knows about the new branch on Chloe's limb on the family tree. 

12. Pinus ponderosa. Chloe asks about Tom's buckle, Tom tells her poker game in Laredo story, remembers the hands at play. Chloe asks how many buckles he has, into the "couple junior rodeo buckles in a box at my sister's," into not doing pro rodeo because uncle Sam had a different plan.

HUNTER: Vietnam.  

TOM: Yessir. 

TRIANGLE BELL from the picnic table.

HUNTER: Maybe more on that another time?

Tom nods, leads toward the picnic table.

Jackie, Sess, Claire with lunch at the table. They watch Tom, Hunter, Chloe approach.

SESS: So how do Hunter and Tom know each other?

JACKIE: They don't. Just met yesterday. More later.

SESS: Okay.

13. Chloe's room, San Luis Obispo, enter Barbara with framed photo of Tom, Hunter and Chloe she places on desk, leaves.

14. Horses and creek. Hunter and Tom re fishing. Jackie and Chloe observe, Claire with Sess records.

15. Wanda, Daisy, Ruth facetime.

16. Barn, horses and hay, Tom and a Honda knot. 

17. Claire's dad (in Ardmore, OK per the water tank framed by window, finishes Foglost, gets Claire selfie with Hunter. 

18. White Sands sunset. Black sand beaches. Jackie's Iceland honeymoon. "Oh."

19. Night. Jackie leaves Hunter's. Starry sky and a shooting star burning out. Hunter re a movie, Tom's a "little tuckered, gonna call my wife and sister, get 'em caught up and onto bed." Hunter about a selfie, into house, garage close.

20. Tom's Tahoe story, Olivia's selfie. 

open to changes

 

act 2, scene 2: about the truck, meet Jackie

act 2, scene 1

HUNTER'S DRIVEWAY - DAY

Garage door opens to Tom, Chloe and Hunter. Tom and Chloe to the truck, Hunter drives Rover to street. Chloe: "Cool truck" into Tom on its history, his "dad's last truck." 

CHLOE: Can I see inside?

TOM: 'Course ya can. 

He opens door.

TOM: Gotcher license?

CHLOE: Yeah.

TOM: Got a car?

CHLOE: No. When I go to college.

Hunter comes over, etc., more re the truck, Chloe sees Alfa Romeo nearing. 

HUNTER: Heeere's Jackie.

Her arrival, intros, Jackie re another surprise guest re her cousin's girlfriend's arrival. The more the merrier, all into Rover and away.

act 2, scene 1: John and Jan powerwalk

act 1 (beats)

Next day, sunrise, John and Jan powerwalk, (with dog?), rural Paso Robles. 

John has "found them" - Tom and Wanda online - having used Tom's middle name to get there. Identifies Laramie and describes the street view, patches of snow on the ground. Jan re "speaking of snow and Wyoming" re Brian's suggestion re Jackson Hole re a discussed ski trip; he has a friend with a time share in Teton Village. "And qe were worried about Brian" re their concern about Tom. "And weren't we worried about Brian." "And weren't we wrong." 

They near their home, near top of hill with view. Jan asks John "have you ever set foot in a cowboy boot?" John tells the Christmas-when-he-was-a-kid story re Roy Rogers boots under tree. Jan: "Had I not asked." Segue into Jan asking if he's called Rachel yet or if he's going to. "Tomorrow, after we get the report on today." SOUND OF ENGINE before pickup truck rounds bend into view, driven by a man in a cowboy hat; he tips it as he drives by and out of view. John and Jan into house. 

this will make Honda Knot better

Slowly coming around to see the benefit in this pause, re gaining clarity re a better way to tell this story, having climbed to this point, rhus gaining better perspective re how to reach the summit. Already know it's going to lose weight where wordiness is concerned.

Blah blah blah. Just a note, since I'm recording this phase, re reason arising from season.

Basically, Rubik's Cubing.

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what's so hard about writing a great screenplay

 

this blog prob'ly coming to its conclusion, having served its purpose.

Other titles: Obstruction, The Symbol of Difficulty, Arresting Movement, Trouble, Obstacles, Barrier

Writerly recognition of need for timeout now

 

Other titles: Keeping Still, The Symbol of Checking and Stopping, Desisting, Stilling, Stillness, Stoppage, Reposing, Resting, Non-action, Stopping

how this stoppage benefit this screenplay

 

Yep. I get it.

the challenge of finishing

 

Likely sit down with it Saturday, unless this aversion is still with me. Get the remaining beats set, build a blog for Final, start Monday. To be determined. Right now mere consideration of story, characters, form brings on malaise and fatigue.      

when Flow returns me to this screenplay

 

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walk away awhile

 

,

recognizing tjhis as Ebb re Flow

 

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what is this impasse to teach me about writing

 

sudden disinterest revisited

 weirdest fckng thing

.

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timeout 4

timeout 3 

sudden disinterest

weird.  suddenly the last thing i want to do is work on this screenplay time for a timeout.

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silly interlude what's the best about this per the director

 

pardon my presumptuous, but:

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the end is near

ending this here other than final beats over the weekend, then build Final Draft blog and laying brick beginning monday. this thing is going to lose weight. need now a timeout for a few days, step back, not think about it, maybe begin Next Project building blocks. this Finalish blog has served its purpose, like a rocjet stage, built to be jettisoned. 

shit, i don;'t even know that Honda Knot will stick as titlr.

now that i have a clear idea re story and structure, i can do pretty much what i want with it.

silly interlude re SHF

 

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silly interlude re get beats set, begin Final monday

 

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act 1 beats

1. Night. Tom and Wanda in bed. Tom reading Foglost, Wanda reading Michener's Hawaii.

2. Next day, sunrise. Tom leaving in truck, WY plates.

3. Gil and Dale, Bandera VFW, re Maria and Boys, Tom and Wanda move, Tom Angel Fire selfie.

4. Wanda and Daisy. Tom call from ABQ motel, Tom leave Ruth VM.

5. Next day, sunrise, Tom leave ABQ motel. 

6. John (driving), Jan, Chloe, Barbara, re horse day and Jackie.

7. Hunter, home office, Chloe pics.

8. Tom driving, Hunter's 'hood.

9. Hunter, kitchen, bag.

10. Tom arrive Hunter's, idle, Hunter out, contact, etc.

11. Tom U-turn. Hunter, greeting area, doorbell. Tom howdy, etc.

12. Wanda and Daisy, Tom call from Hunter's guest room. Tom call Ruth with Gil, peaches. Tom leave, arrive patio, framed in window.

13. Barbara with John and Jan, Hunter's call, Tom Walker, John re middle name.

14. Hunter and Chloe, airport.

15. Hunter and Chloe arrive, truck in driveway, intros.

16. Doc, H/T selfie.

17. Barbara and Brian in bed, he asks, she tells him about Tom and Olivia.

17. Night. Hunter, Chloe, Tom patio post-dinner. Re Jackie about a horse.

timeout 3

timeout 2

A timeout now to survey where I am in this bef0re continuing, knowing that considerable trimming and reconfiguring is required, having come to a better understanding of story and how to tell it. 

related Subtly Penetrating

scene 59 in progress

scene 58

EXT. WINERY PATIO - DAY

View to vineyards and rolling hills. PATRONS include John and Jan at table with bottle of white. FAINT CLASSICAL MUSIC.

JOHN/JAN: We should send them a card.

They smile at each other, hold hands on the table.

JOHN: I’m going to email, Hunter. I’ll ask for the address.

JAN: I’d like to add a couple thoughts.

JOHN: After I check to see if I’ll be emailing a best-selling author.

JAN: Wouldn’t that be something?

JOHN: Won’t it be something is my sense. 

JAN: That won’t hurt where the movie rights are concerned.

JOHN: Who would you cast, any actor, living or not?

JAN: For Robertson.

JOHN: For all the principals.

JAN: Hmm.

She ponders.

JAN: Jack Lemmon.

John considers, nods.

JOHN: I can see it. Yes.

JAN: Who’s the captain?

JOHN: Robert Shaw.

JAN (BEAT): Yes.

JOHN/JAN: The lighthouse operator.

JOHN: Charlie Chaplin.

Jan laughs. John smiles.

JAN: Perfect, of course. The girlfriend.

JOHN: CicelyTyson.

JAN: You’ve thought about this.

JOHN: Not her. Just came to me. You?

Jan’s PHONE RINGTONES Chloe’s ringtone  (TBD). She and Barbara are facetiming.

to be continued.

scene 58

scene 57

EXT. TEXAS FARM-TO-MARKET RD. 337 - DAY

Roadside signage identifies the two-lane highway and that we are looking eastbound at a straight stretch that climbs gradually away from us in countryside populated by oak trees and surrounded by hills. 

The ENGINE SOUND before Tom's truck arrives at the top of the grade and proceeds toward us.

INT. TRUCK

Hunter driving, Wanda front passenger, Ruth in back. 

HUNTER: How did Tom and Gil meet?

RUTH: When our families did, tubing the river.

HUNTER: What river.

RUTH: Medina. 

HUNTER: You, Tom and your parents.

RUTH:  Yes, and the Mendozas. Gil, his sister Soly, for Soledad, and their parents Javier and Rosa. They were living in San Antonio then. 

HUNTER: How old were you? 

RUTH: Ten. Tom was about a couple months away from twelve. Gil had just turned twelve, Soly was two days older than me.

HUNTER: Are or were you and Soly friends?

RUTH: We were. She was struck and killed by lightning when she was seventeen. Around that bend on your left is the gate.

EXT. RANCH GATE

Steel and wood featuring letter M, security light and entry keypad, split-rail fence in both directions.

ENGINE SOUND before truck into view round bend. Hunter drives to the gate, Ruth gets out, entrs code on keypad, gate opens, Ruth gets in, Hunter drives through, gate closes as truck disappears into oak stand.

EXT. RANCH HOUSE - DAY

Stone, steel and wood in clearing in oaks from which dirt driveway emerges to arrive at concrete parking area and big garage, one door of which is open to a mid-70s Corvette with Texas plates, as on the KIA SUV parked at garage's closed door. Gil's truck parked nearby, ski and fish boat on the trailer hitched to it. 

Gil in rocker on deck stands when he HEARS TRUCK ENGINE moments before the truck appears. Ruth and Wanda wave out their windows, Gil waves back, walks to deck steps, Hunter parks at the garage's open door.

INT. GREETING AREA 

Maria and the boys watch discreetly through window curtain crack at Gil walking to Hunter, Ruth and Wanda walking toward him. Gil embraces Ruth and Wanda, he and Hunter shake hands. Maria and the boys watch them walk toward the deck, let the curtain fall back to cover the window, leave frame. FAINT WJHIR OF CICADAS.

silly interlude how am i best writing this

 

Hilary Barrett:

"Subtly penetrating means becoming part of something, or someone. You penetrate subtly by feeling your way into things, yielding gently to their nature. You shift your own ideas and expectations, and come to understand the situation from inside, on its own terms. And so, as you allow things to shape you, you also reach a place where you can shape them. The old Chinese character for 'Subtly Penetrating' shows a stand bearing the official seals a ruler would bestow on those he trusted. Someone who bows down and accepts a seal is submitting to the order of things, entering in and receiving his place within it. Then his seal, sign of personal authenticity, endows him with influence and the power to 'make his mark'."

scene 57 in progress

scene 56

EXT. MORRO STRAND STATE BEACH, CA - SUNRISE

(this scene will change probably considerably from present form.)

Chloe and Barbara walk south along water's edge, toward prominent Morro Rock.  OTHER BEACHGOERS and FOUR SURFERS in wetsuits in the water   Occasional FAINT SEAGULL SQUAWK 

BARBARA: Do we know what your dad is doing today?

CHLOE: Visiting Tom's lifelong best friend and his daughter-in-law and two grandsons outside the town of Medina.

BARBARA:  Conjures curiosity regarding best friend's son. 

CHLOE: He was a Marine who died in Afghanistan, no details beyond that. 

Long pause.

CHLOE (CONT.): Left field.

BARBARA: Alright.

CHLOE: Is it accurate to assume a student deferment kept grampa out of Vietnam?

BARBARA: It is a matter of fact.

CHLOE: You talked about it.

BARBARA: Briefly, when I was your age. What brings this up?

CHLOE: Just curious. Tom was in Vietnam. 

BARBARA: He talked about it.

CHLOE: It came up when I asked about his interrupted rodeo career. He had a First Cavalry tattoo on his right shoulder. 

BARBARA: Brian's dad has an anchor on his left.

CHLOE: Navy Vietnam?

BARBARA: Affirmative. 

CHLOE: Am I ever going to meet him? 

BARBARA: I was going to bring that up. He's coming down for Bryce's first two games, to which you are of course invited.

CHLOE: At Cuesta? 

BARBARA: At Cuesta.

CHLOE: Sure. When, more or less exactly.

BARBARA: First weekend in February, against Santa Barbara City. 

CHLOE: Cool. 

They veer away from the water to QUARTER-FULL PARKING LOT

BARBARA: Your dad mentioned you going to Texas when he goes back with Tom's ashes.

CHLOE: I was going to bring that up. I'd fly into Austin, tour of campus and town, then to Ruth's. Looking at coming back the Saturday before school starts. Cool?

BARBARA: Cool. I wonder when we'll get to meet them?

CHLOE: I'm thinking maybe my graduation?

BARBARA: Great idea. 

CHLOE: I'll invite them when I'm there. If yes, dad will rent and make a week of it.

BARBARA: Sounds good. By the way, grams and gramps want to send a card.

CHLOE: I'll get the address tonight.

They reach the lot and walk to a Porsche 987-model Boxster.

BARBARA: Breakfast at A-Town?

CHLOE: I'm down.

BARBARA: Down enough to get us there?

Barbara gets keys from pocket, extends them to Chloe.

CHLOE: For real?

Barbara nods, Chloe takes keys, they hug, Chloe gets in behind the wheel, Barb in passenger seat, Chloe starts engine, lowers the convertible top, finds reverse on the manual transmission, backs out of space, finds first gear, drives to road, turns onto it, drives away, finds second gear, turns out of view.